our biography

We received the big homestudy writeup from our social worker the other night. I was up late working, it was about 2am but I had to read it through. After 3 interviews, she'd put together a pretty comprehensive biography. It includes our separate backgrounds, our life together, family relationships and issues, and religious beliefs, as well as how we intend to parent. Tonight we're going through it in detail, addressing any errors or misinterpretations. There are a few, which we're working on correcting, but for the most part, she got it pretty much right.

It is strange to see yourself written about in such detail, especially since the purpose of the bio is to determine whether we're approved for adoption, and to help the adoption social worker (someone different from the person doing the writeup) find a good match for us. To see our own lives through the prism of someone else's interpretation, and to consider the implications for our adoption, felt very strange. It was a bit of an out of body experience - like hearing your own voice on the radio, or seeing a video of yourself when you didn't know it was being taken.

I enjoyed seeing how our relationship was represented - she got that we are playful and loving towards each other. And though we were a little worried about how she responded to the dogs, she reported that they seemed to be fine for children.

In the end, she recommends us as approved, and will submit the final, corrected version to her supervisor, who will review all of our paperwork and make a final determination.

This is, of course, a huge relief. While we didn't expect to be rejected, you always carry that fear in the back of your mind that something you did or said, or something she perceived, would tip the scales in the wrong direction.

Our next steps are to write up our "adoption plan," which spells out our commitment to how we intend to interact with the birth mother, and of course our birth mother letter.